Those who can, teach.

I guess I didn't update for a while. I blame school.

However, it's spring break! Wooooo! Last week was pretty hellish; I had huge, major assignments due in every class, including a seminar to my whole department on my thesis. My talk went really well, though; I tend to think of myself as someone who's terrible at public speaking, but it went smoothly, and everyone said I didn't appear nervous and got the information across well.

Here's the thing: I wasn't nervous. I was presenting on something I knew well--my research of the past nine months--to people who wanted to understand it. And it was great, other than the fact that I was sleep-deprived and thinking of how I needed to get studying for my exam the next day.

Which means I immediately started thinking again about how much I love sharing my chemistry knowledge. And would love to teach, if I could just get over my fear of talking in front of people--which apparently vanishes when I'm talking about a subject I feel confident in, like chemistry I know well instead of music I've been researching for a week or something.

So maybe academia is for me, after all. I know I function well on the long stretches of intense work followed by some time I can schedule myself. I am pretty decent at juggling a lot of responsibilities, too--better when I'm saner, and I get more sane every day, I think. We'll see, I guess.

I still don't know if I'm ready to leave Portland, or to leave chemistry. I know materials science is a lot like chemistry, but it's not quite the same. Am I ready for the big switch? Am I ready for grad school at all? I think the answer to the latter is demonstably yes, but do I really want to go to grad school next year? I've wanted to take a year off for the last three years, and this is pretty much my last chance. Hmm....

Well, now to get down to work. I know it's break, but I have a lot to get out the door by the end of the week.

-Jenn-